El Salvador 2026…Day 6

Prison. 

It’s a place that might elicit different emotions from different perspectives. A place of punishment for some…while providing protection for others. A place of consequence for poor choices and outright rebellion...A place that, unfortunately, also offers consequences to those that love someone who lives there. A place where sins are many and grace is absent. 

Santa Ana women's prison

I have had my own notions about what prison is or what I think it should be like. And I'm not sure that my perspective is right or wrong. I'm finding that, after seeing more clearly from the inside, there is more of a tension in my heart about a firm stance on how I SHOULD feel about all of it.

There is a little decal at the top of the van that says IN GOD WE TRUST. It's parked outside the prison.

Friday, we drove for about two hours to get to a women’s prison outside of Santa Ana El Salvador. It was the same one I worked in 2 years ago. This experience was the same and different all at the same time. 

There are more than 13,000 women locked in this large white compound. They are divided into 10 sectors. Last time we visited the sector with the sickest women. This year, we worked in the roughest sector. This sector has many still-active gang members. And plenty of tattoos to prove it. On their faces, their fingers, their necks, their arms...all branded with who they belong to. 

We had 5 American doctors and 7 El Salvadoran doctors. Between the dozen of us we saw about 450 women in 6 hours. It was exhausting, but more so because by then, my head was already as tired as my body. 

Google map overhead of the prison complex-courtesy of the Cami and Molly

The layout of this sector was different than my previous experience and you could see so many more things in this sector. Last trip you could barely see into their cells, and what you could see was a mass of chocolate faces. This time, we could clearly see into the cells. The chocolate faces all had two big eyes that were focused in on all of us. No doubt we were the most exciting thing they had seen recently. They were still dressed in white shirts and white long pants...a sea of fallen angels.

Because we were in their building, they had to be in their "rooms." There were 9 caged areas that were approximately 40 by 40 feet. I wouldn’t be able to guess how many bunks were in each, but they were stacked in some cases and some were singles. They were quite close together with not much room for women to stand and move between them. The bunks were a bit shorter than a twin bed in the states but about as wide. Each bunk was shared between 2-3 women and in each of those 40x40 spaces, there were approximately 125 women living in there. There were no pillows…and the thin pads covering the bed was no more than 1 inch thick. Someone later said that the women turn over in tandem at night. 

The doors were unlocked but someone stood at the door. It seemed that many, if not all, had their own white knapsack or basket of things that were tied to the ceiling wires or the walls. The rooms were separated by wire panels…think livestock fencing. Like canary cages really. No walls, just fences within that entire complex.

Many of them stood looking out at the action all day. They were eager to make eye contact. Their smiles came easily when I held their gaze, and often times they would offer their hands up in a small wave. 

And they were grateful. Grateful to be seen and heard. As we left, I was slowly walking, making eye contact, and waving...a lady from the middle of a pack of women was yelling in English...God bless you. We are so thankful to God for sending you all to us to take care of us. We appreciate you. Thank you God for sending these people. Thank you. 

It was a goosebump moment. And a reminder. Sometimes you just have to show up. One held glance. One wave of acknowledgement that screams I SEE YOU...People can exist on this moment. And you don't have to leave your passport at the gate in another country to do that. 

Most of these women have children whom they haven’t seen or heard from since they got there. Many left small children and know they are missing their growing years. Often times they have no idea who is raising them either. It is rare for there to be any outside contact for these women. Abandoned. One woman told me that she was sure that they all had stomach problems because they were worrying about their kids. Most of them have NOOO idea how long they are in there. One woman that I saw has been in there for 20 years of a 40 year sentence. Twenty YEARS. I looked back in those cells after she said that, wondering how a person can survive that. The hopeless feeling of every day being the same as the last and the same as the next. No room to move your body, cry to yourself, or think. Overcrowded and overstimulated 24/7. Literally. For 40 years. The bible tells us much about an eternal place just like this...called Hell...but then I digress...

 

The complaints were many. Headaches, constipation, heartburn, and stomach aches were hands down the top complaints of the day. And their diets lend to those issues. They rarely eat any meat. Molly heard someone mention that they all get a soy protein powder. They rarely get vegetables either. This leads to so much constipation. They get mostly food like mac and cheese, cereals, breads, and eggs. Most of them drink lots of water though, between 2-4 liters of it daily. 

Several of them had much deeper problems though, and issues that we didn't have the tools to deal with. Each time I told them what I could help with and advised that they would have to seek more help with the local doctor...Oscar interpreted to me that appointments were often made...and canceled. Tests were ordered...but never completed. And it was obvious that I was in a no win situation...and so were they. I asked a few of them why they were there...extortion, homicide, and gang activity were the answers. I asked more of them about their children. Sons and daughters-babies to young children to adults...but now unseen to these women...the four year old they last saw is now nearing teenager stage. Torture for their souls all day, every day.

Oscar, an interpreter that worked with us all week, was a phenomenal man of God. He had come with Pastor Coto (the director of CFCI in El Salvador) to the church on Sunday. And on Monday, he came to me and said "You are like a preacher (based on the words I spoke to the church body the day before). I am tasking you to be checking on the spiritual needs of the people you meet this week. Many of them need much more than physical solutions." I agreed that they did...And I told him I would do my best to cover that too. 

The problem (or maybe an excuse) was that we were so short on interpreters, that they were running among all of us, trying to help where they could. That left no time or resources to dig into the deeper questions...because getting the answers that took time and energy that was unavailable...BUT by Friday, we were bottlenecked together and less people needed an interpreter...so Oscar and I were able work together consistently that day, and had the opportunity to talk about Christ with several handfuls of women. 

We had one woman who accepted Jesus as her Lord and Savior...She was listening and crying. Oscar, in Spanish, led her through a prayer of repentance, and I prayed over her while he interpreted. We wrote her name down for the pastor so he can connect with her later. 

A second woman had a friend in the prison that is a Christian. One friend. She talks to her about the bible and Jesus. The woman gets up at 4:00 AM to go to the church service in their sector, just to listen. She knows that she will eventually trust Jesus and give her life to Him, but she wasn't ready that day. We urged her not to wait, and I hope she doesn't. We also had another who was not interested, but was actually deeply interested. She asked some very legit questions about her rebellious nature and forgiveness issues. Those were answered, but she wore a very stoic facial expression. Her eyes, however told a different story, if that is at all possible. I can't explain how I could feel that there was a hunger within her...it had to be the Spirit. She said at the end of it all, that she wasn't interested in what Jesus offers. But seeds were planted there...and I pray that God will continue to draw her to Himself.

Another woman wasn't interested in hearing about Jesus at all. Oscar laid it all out, but there was nothing behind her eyes. Hardened heart. 

I was questioning Oscar later about the woman who was asking the questions...he reminded me that they are in prison. All those women were watching...watching the faces and interactions of each woman that saw a doctor that day...and there were many potential consequences of the women in the prison seeing you "weak." Seeing your tears, your interest, you making a change to be different.

 Just like in many places, if Jesus is a taboo subject for the people in your life, accepting His sacrificial gift, is unpopular...and can create a more unpleasant atmosphere for the person making the decision. Even though Jesus said that you must give up everything you have and everything you are to follow Him...most of us don't take that literally when we really think about it. Most people reading this aren't in a position of isolating themselves from loved ones or creating stress and friction in their environments from their choice to follow Christ. The woman was potentially counting the cost before making the choice...and at least on Friday, the cost was more than she was willing to pay.

The whole experience that morning reminded me of 1 Corinthians 3:5-11 which reads...

What is Apollos, really? Or what is Paul? Servants through whom you came to believe, and each of us in the ministry the Lord gave us.[g] I planted,[h] Apollos watered, but God caused it to grow. So neither the one who plants counts for anything,[i] nor the one who waters, but God who causes the growth.  The one who plants and the one who waters work as one,[j] but each will receive his reward according to his work.  We are coworkers belonging to God.[k] You are God’s field, God’s building. According to the grace of God given to me, like a skilled master-builder I laid a foundation, but someone else builds on it. And each one must be careful how he builds. For no one can lay any foundation other than what is being laid, which is Jesus Christ. 

Oscar and I WERE doing the work that God had sent us to do...We were planting seeds and watering seeds that had been previously planted by someone else. God was also gracious to show us some fruit as we watched a woman in the prison ask for His salvation to be granted to her.

The whole day wasn't spent like that...There were 500 women to be seen. We were only able to speak to a few, but we are confident that God chose those women for whatever reason, to get those words on that day.

And back to the tension in my own heart...these women were all sinners, on unimaginable levels in some cases...yet, they all were created in the image of God...and they all have the capacity at any time, to turn from their sins and turn toward Jesus. And that makes them valuable in the sight of the Lord. The living conditions in this prison, from both experiences that I have had...is literally abuse and neglect and is creating chronic health problems for these women that will ultimately cost their system more money, or take years off of the lives of these women. 

You are entitled to your own opinion, but don't be confident that your opinion is correct until you have listened to their stories and cried with their broken souls. I'm actually pretty certain, that if there was a prison like that around here...that would be my thing. It's a field ripe for the harvest...but the workers there are few! 

There is always much for me to consider after we leave one of the prisons...and I was glad for a fun night ahead to take my mind off the heaviness. That's why I couldn't really process that day until now. I needed to have time and head space available to think through it all. And I'm not fully convinced that I have it all figured out yet. 

The drive back was uneventful...still lots of traffic. They have really outgrown their transportation infrastructure. They are doing a lot of construction, but the sheer volume of traffic is insane. There is a lot of trucks like this...El Salvadoran ride share. 

It makes sense, but it is always so shocking to see so many people standing in the back of an open truck getting to work. It was also common to see how the street vendors transport their goods. These ladies were, no doubt, heading to their street stand or corner spot.

We celebrated the finished work week at El Atico, a pupuseria on the side of a volcano, looking at the volcano that we would eat at on Saturday night. I had insulted my own metabolism enough by now, and I didn't think I could, in good conscience, eat another pupusa. Fortunately they had more things on the menu, and I had a grilled chicken with pico and avocado. There is something about the chicken in El Salvador that is unforgettable...not because I can't forget the sight of chickens in peoples houses, or unsee the crazy long necked turkey-chickens around every corner of the Island...but because the taste is PHENOMENAL!! 

I have also started to notice, that no one rushes to get the checks, no one is in a hurry to be in and out...People here linger. Meals seemingly take for-EVER. But I believe it is good for the soul to just enjoy good food...and sit. Noticing what God has put around us...whether that be the people, a mountain vista, or your own dead yard plants. The experience of just being still right in the moment of nourishment is priceless. There were plenty of Burger Kings, Wendy's, McDonalds taking up places among the small groceries and pupuserias. But everywhere you looked there was a tiny restaurant, filled with people at all times of the day. They were just sitting over food. My guess is, that their culture will soon be screaming at them to be as busy as our culture...as more people rush into the American fast food restaurants to get out and get on with their day. I hope they can resist. It was refreshing to be forced to linger. 

My biggest regret of all, is that, in the hurry to get on the road from the prison, is that our El Salvadoran team members, didn't get out of the prison at the same time we did...and the opportunity to say Thanks...and Until next time was taken away. Our job this week was small compared to theirs. We may give up our own lives for a week, but they are the heros that work in the trenches here on the daily. And they need support and encouragement!! We are a blessing to them too as we work together to care for their people. I was able to get small love offerings from me and my people back to the team via Ronald. I pray that God would bless their lives through that.

Tomorrow will be our free day to explore, shop, and eat. I'm excited to turn 53 in a foreign land. I hope God allows me more opportunities in my minutes left on earth to serve Him, not just in my own sphere...but also to serve Him in other lands. 

Thanks again for reading along!! A few more posts will follow, so stay tuned!! I love hearing your comments...they are encouraging to me and my own journey! Just remember to sign your name if you don't want to be anonymous!